Proverbs 5

office

“For the lips of the adulterous woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil; but in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword.” Proverbs 5:3-4

I stared at the screen in shock and horror. The man with whom I had been flirting for months at work – who had been flirting with me – already had a girlfriend.  He had never mentioned her to me, had given no indications.  I had only found out through some good old-fashioned Internet stalking.  And here I was, an adulteress.

The flirtation had started out innocently enough.  Just some traded jokes, the kind of sarcastic witticisms that were just the type to hook my interest.  It hadn’t felt like anything wrong.

But the comments had turned into phone calls and inside jokes and at some point, a light switched on inside me.  My breathing became shaky when I talked to him, and my heart pounded to the point I could barely pick up the phone.  Our communication was all under the veil of work, but to me it had taken on a greater significance.

What’s more, he knew and encouraged it.  I tried several times to break it off, even telling him that I didn’t think it was right to flirt at work.  And yet every time that I seemed to successfully halt the communication, he would email me with one of our inside jokes and back I would fall.

Finally, I simply told him that if he was interested in me, he should ask me out.  And he didn’t.  Crushed, I turned to the only tool at my disposal, trying to figure out answers – Facebook.  And there the real truth was.  Another woman.  More, I was the “other woman” in this triangle!

I never confronted him.  I doubt he saw what he did was wrong.  To him, they were just words. But I learned an important lesson: to not fall into the trap of flirtation without substance and truth behind it.

Men and women of Christ will not lead you astray but will pursue a real relationship.  Do not be distracted by others’ honeyed words and smooth speech.

Join the conversation!  Have you had a similar experience or what struck you from Proverbs 5?

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3 thoughts on “Proverbs 5

  1. The tragic thing is – he might have known that what he did was not really ok. Maybe he thought he would have some fun while his girlfriend wasn’t around.
    Or maybe he genuinely didn’t think it was wrong.
    But he kept “dripping honey” even though he was told to curb it. I think this verse teaches us something valuable – to be careful if something seems too smooth 😉 It frequently turnes into bitter times when we get to the truth.

    • I agree, Ania! Thank you for your response!

      Re his intentions, well, I actually had to work towards forgiveness because I did in fact blame him. One way I was able to forgive was by looking at the situation through his potential lens and giving him every possible good intention. Sometimes when we’re victims, I think it’s easy to believe the other person meant to hurt us and that fuels our hurt and anger. But by seeing him as being at least not purposefully cruel, I was able to forgive and let go!

      I completely agree with you about being cautious if something is too smooth!!

  2. This is so true! A man of integrity doesn’t lead a woman on. And the thing is if you’ve been starving for affection, any type of honey looks mighty good! I’m so glad you had the strength to recognize it for what it was and stand firm in your stance rather than continue the “flirtlationship.”

    @ Ania, yes! I’ve heard the saying, “If it looks too good to be true, it probably is.”

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