Alright, I am going to keep it real with you all. I am not that person. You know, the person who wakes up at 6 am so she can get in her quiet time with the Lord and always has at least one Bible study in progress. The one who spends her summer memorizing whole chapters of the Bible. The one who can quote you chapter and verse for every situation you might encounter. I have a best friend like that. But I am not her.
I am the person who has to be forced to be in the Word. Who needs an outside motivator, like a “chapter of the day” reading that appeases my Type A self. Who gets bored because (a) I have read it all before and (b) sometimes the life application just isn’t immediately apparent (I am looking at you, Numbers).
I am not proud of this. I want to be a “better” Christian. I want to be the best witness. But…life. But…laziness. But…I would rather be watching Netflix.
So what do I do? Well, for this month – coincidentally the one devoted to being in the Word – I am in two separate studies. One weekly at church and one biweekly with my friends. It is a scheduled activity that forces me to stay on track and reading Scripture. I know myself and I know I need the accountability.
And as God does, He has used these times to speak to my heart at just the moment that I needed it. I will be honest: have felt emotionally depleted lately. No particular reason – my life is full and beyond blessed. But instead of feeling empowered, I just want to sit on the couch in stretchy pants and binge watch Project Runway (this may or may not have happened this weekend). I don’t want to cook, I don’t want to clean, I don’t want to go out. I really don’t want to do…anything.
In the midst of this low season, I read His word that gives me encouragement. I can feel it whisper to me, tugging on my soul that this too shall pass, that He has greater plans for me.
Most importantly, I have been struggling with a work situation – an interpersonal relationship that I thought was getting better, only to find that it had turned around and bitten me. It has cost me lost sleep several times over the past few months and I have felt the sting of “righteous” anger (ahem, at least in my opinion). But then when I went to my church study this week, God spoke the verse that we must all be slow to anger and slow to speak. I felt that He was speaking right to my heart and telling me to slow my roll and reconsider my heart.
So, even (or especially!) in this dry season, I want to return again and again to the well of living water. Only there can I be filled.
Have you been in a dry season when it comes to the Scripture? How have you overcome it?