March/April: I Am Most Wanted

giphy (2).gifSo the whispers were true.

The fifth grade boys had allegedly ranked all the girls and listed each girl’s score on a sheet of composition paper. As is the way of 10-year-olds, secrets are never kept and soon, the list’s existence became the talk of the playground.  I giggled about it with my friends but I never let on about my deep concern. Was I pretty enough to be on the list? What was my score?

One afternoon, I found myself next to the spokesboy of this ranking committee. He hunched over the list while giving me side eyes of mischief and glee. It was then I decided that it was now or never. I snatched the list and won the precipitating vigorous tug of war. I skimmed the rudimentary chart to find my name and my score.  And there it was, in gray penciled certitude. My score was a 2.

I crushed the paper as hard I could, squashing into a ball. The subsequent outcry of my male classmates fell on my deaf and hurt ears.  The list was destroyed and so was my hope that I was wanted.

Feeling unwanted hurts, especially in seasons of singleness. It can feel like an incurable disease, endless, painful, and lonely. That’s why it’s wonderful to remember the truth of the matter. You are wanted. You are needed. You are sought after. Most of all, you are desired.

In Luke 15:4-6, Jesus says,

“If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them gets lost, what will he do? Won’t he leave the ninety-nine others in the wilderness and go to search for the one that is lost until he finds it? And when he has found it, he will joyfully carry it home on his shoulders. When he arrives, he will call together his friends and neighbors, saying, ‘Rejoice with me because I have found my lost sheep.’”

In fact, it takes the entire chapter of Luke 15 to explain how the Father seeks after His loved ones, us. You don’t look for something that’s worthless. A dropped penny means nothing to me. But a missing $100 bill will cause me to retrace steps, look under rocks, and turn my home upside down. That is how much Jesus wants you.

This March and April, remember, rediscover, and recognize that you are most wanted.

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